More Holy Spirit, Please

A good place to begin today is to think a bit about the relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. They are collectively referred to as The Holy Trinity, aka our three-in-one God. How their internal relationship works is a mystery we accept more than we understand.

There's a fitting parallel in a French novel from 1884 titled "The Three Musketeers". The motto of the main characters is

"All for One and One for All!"

It's safe to assume that their motto describes, at least in part, the internal relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

But I'm thinking we can go deeper than that. 

Wrestling in Your Soul

Ultimately, there are two Kingdoms: Jesus' kingdom of light vs. the Satanic kingdom of darkness.

Our fully sovereign Creator gives each person the freedom to choose between the two. He tries to draw us, woo us, and influence us to choose Jesus and His kingdom. But He won't force us.

An Old Warhorse

Today I'm sharing thoughts about warhorses. This analogy first came to mind decades ago. I don't recall now what stirred this to life, but I do know that God was in it and that He used it to speak to me down deep in my soul. Maybe this is mostly for me, but I think it will speak to you, too.

I'm certainly no expert on horses or on warhorses, for that matter, so if my historical accuracy is a little off, please bear with me. It's my story, after all.

A Soft and Tender Heart

The choices you make as a Believer have a huge impact on your life and the lives of others. For it to be a godly impact, you must maintain a soft and tender heart towards God. 

Choosing that kind of heart is up to you. He'll help you, but you determine the tenderness of your heart.

Psalm 95:7-8 (NIV)

Today, if only you would hear his voice, “Do not harden your hearts..."

 

He wouldn't have said that if you didn't have a choice in the matter. As Tarzan might have said it, 

"Hard heart bad. Soft heart good."

Embracing His Plan

From the beginning, God's plan through Jesus has been to rescue fallen people and take them to Himself in Heaven. In large measure, He's delaying judgement on this fallen world, allowing more time for more people to turn to Him. And not for them to just kind of turn; to really turn, an all the way deep down in the heart kind of turn that impacts every part of a person's life.

That kind of heart change won't always be easy. But whether it's easy or not, the goal for us, more than anything, should be to sell out completely to whatever makes our Creator's heart sing and rejoice.  

The Truth About Death

There. That got your attention. Now let me explain what I means when I say "The Truth About Death." 

You might guess I'm talking about becoming less self-oriented and more Christ-oriented.

That's a good guess. Jesus spoke repeatedly to His disciples that they must die to living for themselves and instead live for Him. Matthew 16:24 and Mark 8:34 are good examples. That is the subject of many sermons, and rightfully so, but that's not the kind of death I'm talking about today.

This is. 

Israel Under Attack: The Real Battle, Part 1

The original "Israel Under Attack: The Real Battle", was getting a bit long, so I broke it into two parts. This is Part 1. Click here for Part 2.

I was stirred to begin writing these comments in October 2023, in the midst of the evil, murderous attacks on Israel by Hamas, Hezbollah, and others. They're supported by the leaders of Iran. These are wicked, demon-driven attacks.

Around the world, calls for destruction and violence against Jews are loud and spreading. In this episode, I want to clarify God’s thoughts on all of this. 

If you don’t like what I’m saying, take it up with the Bible. 

Israel Under Attack: The Real Battle, Part 2

The original "Israel Under Attack: The Real Battle", was getting a bit long, so I've broken it into two parts. This is Part 2. Click here for Part 1. 

I was stirred to begin writing these comments in October 2023, in the midst of the evil, murderous attacks on Israel by Hamas, Hezbollah, and others. They're supported by the leaders of Iran. These are wicked, demon-driven attacks.

Around the world, calls for destruction and violence against Jews are loud and spreading. 

Here, in Part 2, I want to further clarify God’s thoughts on all of this. 

If you don’t like what I’m saying, take it up with the Bible. 

When Change is Good

People tend to want things to stay the same. Even people who are in bad situations are often afraid of change. Fear has them paralyzed. But Jesus is all about change, radical change. He died to make radical change possible. More than that, He lives to make radical change happen. After all, He is the Author AND Finisher of our Faith (Hebrews 12:2).

May this message stir your heart to a greater passion for our Lord Jesus and the things He is passionate about. 

The Pastor’s Two Masters

This message is subtitled "Caught between The Rock and a Hard Place".

I've never been responsible for a church staff or budget. I've never been a paid church employee. But I can tell you what I've observed. Please take this as a warning, as a light shining into a dark place. 

This isn't a rebuke...that would have to come from the Lord Himself. If this applies to you, I'm honored if you think of me as little more than Balaam's donkey (Numbers 22:21-35). This is God's message, not mine. If you don't like what I'm saying, take it up with the Bible.

Hang on, this could hurt. I may ramble a bit, but I'm making what I believe to be very valid points. Some Pastors manage to avoid this trap, but many don't.

Prophetic Intercession

There are a variety of roles in the Body of Believers. He has a customized role for each of His children (1 Corinthians 12:12-27). Whatever your role, great glory has been written into it.  

When it comes to prayer, God wants every Believer to have an intimate and effective prayer life. But not everyone is called to have the same prayer style. There are many good books about growing an effective prayer life. I'm not trying to outdo those. In this episode, I'm simply hoping to supplement those teachings.

Praying in His Name

A close, loving relationship with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit is the key to an effective prayer life, much more so than ritualistic word formulas or special phrases we hope will make God respond.

Jesus told us to pray in His name, meaning to pray as His representative. Unfortunately, saying "In the name of Jesus" at the end of our prayers has become something less than what He intended.

It's All About Relationship

Being born-again is absolutely free, provided you're willing to pay the high price. That sounds like a contradiction, but it's not. Jesus makes it easy to be born again. But He also makes it very expensive. Let me explain.

The Shalom Dome: A Call to Prayer

In this Bonus Episode, I'm sharing a Holy Spirit encounter that rolled over me in the early morning hours of August 4, 2024. The Holy Spirit is urging me to share this as a call for prayer.

Rethink Yourself

Today, my prayer is 

Lord, let your people wake up before they have to be shaken awake.

In Psalm 19:12, David asks the Lord, 

Who could possibly know all that he has done wrong? Forgive my hidden and unknown faults.

In this episode, I'm talking about an issue that limits the faith-walk of a lot of good people. It's potentially very serious, a big sinkhole in their path through this life. Satan will do his best to take advantage of it before people -- before you -- wake up. You should make this a matter of prayer. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you what's ahead in your path: a sinkhole, a pothole, just a rough patch, or smooth sailing.

It Really Is All About Jesus

When you boil everything down, this creation really is all about Jesus and His plans. It's His story. We are simply characters in His play, on His stage, in His theater. He owns the whole nine yards.

No matter what anyone says, Jesus is not a character on our stage. He's not an actor in our play. We exist for Him, not the other way around.  

At this point, you may be asking "If it's all about Jesus, what's in it for me?" The one word answer is "Everything".

Tell Them I Love Them

While praying about the next God's Clay God's Way episode, in my spirit I heard the Lord say “Tell them I love them.” This is the first episode that followed.

The Lord God Almighty loves you and wants to spend eternity with you. He wants to take you through the brokenness of this world to a wonderful new life with Him. That new life begins the moment you're born again, then keeps going far beyond however many years you have left here.

God's Love vs. Hell

The Lord God Almighty, the Creator and Owner of it all, loves you. Yes, you. It's His nature to love. He can't help Himself.

So, if He loves everyone, why does He send people to Hell? The answer is actually very simple, but getting to that simple answer will take laying some groundwork. So hang on, here we go.

Coulda Woulda Shoulda

If you're a born-again disciple of the Lord Jesus, His call is deep and ongoing, extending well beyond your time on this earth. He doesn't want you to look back and see you've lived a Coulda Woulda Shoulda brand of barely there Christianity. He's calling us deeper, to stand strong...and to take a strong stand.

The Unforgivable Sin

Jesus said that blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is the unforgivable sin. Yes, that's what He said. It's recorded in Matthew chapter 12 and Mark chapter 3. But I think unpacking what Jesus said requires more than a surface reading of those verses. So, what's the big picture He was talking about? My conclusion might surprise you.

What Will Heaven Be Like?

The Bible tells us to set our mind on things above, not on things on the earth. Colossians 3:2. To do that, the more we know about heaven, the better. Faith will unlock these things in your heart. Faith takes as fact truths that are not yet apparent to your physical senses.

God's Master Plan

God has always had a Master Plan, and that plan is glorious, generous, and gracious. It covers far more than people and angels. It includes the many other things He’s created. Today, though, I want us to visualize the portion of His Master Plan for humanity. It will help us see more about why we're here.

Creator God is fully sovereign. He has purposes and plans for every season of this life. But does He always get His way? No, by His sovereign choice, at one level He doesn't always get His way. But, in the big picture, He is getting His way. That sounds contradictory, but it’s not. Let me explain.

Through and To

When faced with the cross, Jesus looked past it to the ultimate joy set before Him. He foresaw the magnificent outcome for Himself and the vast multitude of people He was buying with His sacrifice. He looked past the suffering to the glorious result. That empowered Him to endure. That's what the Bible says in Hebrews 12:2.

We are to do the same thing, looking beyond any present distress we may encounter.

Freedom to Choose

Questions about God’s sovereignty have been on my plate recently. Is He in charge or isn’t He? The straight answer is that He is fully sovereign, always is fully sovereign, and has never NOT been fully sovereign. But He has chosen to do things with His sovereignty that make the picture from here seem unclear at times.

Much More Than This Life

This life isn't just about this life. As big and as complicated as this life is, it's really just a set up for what God has planned next.

This is about what's in the heart of the Lord God Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, Owner of all life and of all eternity. He is the One and Only God. There is no other. there is no equal. He really really wants you with Him in His eternal heaven where He can love on you, enjoy you, and indulge the passion of His heart in you. That's why He made you.

The Pop Quiz

This world is loaded—year after year, century after century--with evil, with demonic inhumanity, with spiritual corruption, with all kinds of immorality and unrighteousness, with hatred, cruelty, gross injustice, terror, violence, and horror. Calling it sheer ungodliness doesn't seem nearly strong enough.

I'm not going to downplay how bad that is. I'm not going to blow smoke and say Aw, it ain't that bad because, well, it is that bad. It's even far far worse than that bad. Immeasurably worse. This world is no longer close to the beautiful, wonderful, very very good world that God originally made it to be. 

How God Sees Life and Death

God sees life and death very differently than we do. He is just as close to me now as He will be when I am in heaven. But for now, I’m only partially aware of His closeness. That will change when I leave this earth and this "earth suit" for His heavenly presence. For those who belong to Jesus, He sees our death in this world as a rescue away from the evil, corruption, trauma, and flat out horror of this present world age.

Temporary Reality vs Permanent Reality

God is the only creator, there is no other. He made it all, whatever it is and wherever it is, both the animate and the inanimate. If it exists, He made it. If it exists, He owns it. Since He made it and owns it, He gets to do what He wants with it, He gets to determine its purpose and reason for being. And that includes the purpose and reason for being of you and me.

Have It His Way

This is Brother Mark. I've titled today's message "Have It His Way."

As the one and only Creator, God owns the creation...which is to say He owns everything, absolutely EVERYTHING...He fully owns this world and all that is in it. He fully owns every being, both in this physical realm and in what is to us the unseen spiritual realm. 

He made it all, He owns it all, He alone gets to decide what to do with it and what He wants to get out of it. He has His reasons for making it all. Whether anyone likes it or not, that's just the way it is. So get used to it. 

Just Who Does God Think He is?

In this episode, I want to talk about God's authority, rule, and ownership...of everything. Absolutely everything. 

You may find this uncomfortable or even scary. You may disagree with what I'm saying. It's your right to disagree. But I am confident in this: if you choose to disregard what I'm about to say, you do so at your own peril. If you let it, what I'm about to share will give you a new and wonderful perspective on life. 

He Can't Help Himself

Love is driven to express itself. Love demands an outlet. To be fulfilled, Love needs to give itself away. In a very real sense, the One who loves is driven to express and indulge Himself in the object of His love. In the human world, when you love a baby, it's hard not to want to hold and cuddle that little one and kiss all over the little baby's sweet face. 

What Drive's God?

For several months, I've felt the Holy Spirit leading me to contemplate this question: What drives God? What is so important about humanity that He would be willing to put up with all the pain this world brings to His heart? Here is what I believe He wants me to share with you.

The Buyer Has Spoken

As people, we usually think either too much or too little of ourselves. I doubt we often get it right the way God sees it. So, what is your real value? I believe I can help you find the answer. Even a seasoned Christian may find this answer surprisingly simple.

His Ideas vs My Ideas

This is what I'm hearing this morning. I hope this comes across as the encouragement it's meant to be. I will always want the very best for you.

Many times, the Lord's ideas about what's good for you aren't the same as your ideas about what's good for you. 

Much Bigger, Much Smaller: He is Both

I've long had a very expansive view of God. He is huge in all possible ways. I'm not really talking about physical size, understand. His knowledge is unlimited, His capabilities are immeasurable. But, over the last few years, He has been nudging me with a new sense of His size, and this is about the best way I know to describe it.

He is Especially Fond of You

Tonight, this is what I hear the Lord telling me to share. He is especially fond of you. Yes, you. He is also especially fond of this Sister over here and that Brother over there, and of each one in between. He has a special and unique fondness for each Christ follower. He loves us all the same, yet He loves each of us differently. That sounds like a contradiction, but it's not. Let me explain.

Not Getting an Answer?

There are times when we're desperate for God’s intervention, help, and deliverance, but He doesn't seem to show up. When you turn something over to God and don't feel like you're getting a working response from Him, there could be other factors holding things up.

Sing to My Heart

I absolutely love songs that draw me to Him. Songs that touch my heart. Songs that make me cry in a good way. Here's a couple of songs that I've really been enjoying lately. Even with good speakers on my computer, I prefer to listen over a nice pair of headphones; somehow it's easier to get lost in the song.

May your heart be deeply touched; may you be moved closer to God.

Thoughts About You

I am so grateful that our Father lets me pray the good things from His heart into your life. He is using all of the circumstances of your life, including the difficult ones -- maybe especially the difficult ones -- to shape you. He is very good at what He does.

I'm wondering about the dreams He has for you. I know just the generalities, and they're very good. Beyond that, I am also convinced that the details will be just as fabulous. It will all be seen when His full story is told.

In the meantime, embrace the mystery. It's a mystery He holds safely in His heart, and it's right to trust His heart. He is writing your part in His story in you, through you, and around you. I must say that the part He is writing for you is a part He really, really likes.

I would love to hear the tale of your life someday, not just the events and timeline, but the heart stuff you share only with someone who really cares about you. That's how God feels about sharing His heart stuff. 

If you really care about Him, He will share His heart with you.

I want to repeat something I've written previously. This is all really simple, beyond all the Scripture and theology. He looks at you and says, "Tell you what, you love Me with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength -- with all you've got -- and I'll love you with all My heart, soul, mind and strength -- with all I've got. Then we'll walk down this path together."

He's Not Your Drunk Uncle

Most of us know someone like this; maybe he's a relative or an acquaintance, or maybe you've only seen him on TV. Whichever, you'll know what I'm talking about. This person is the guy who shows up at a family reunion or picnic or some other family gathering and may already have had too much to drink. Sooner or later, he spills his paper plate full of food, stumbles around, says the wrong things, and generally makes everyone uncomfortable.

 

Everyone is embarrassed for him, but he doesn't have the sense to be embarrassed for himself. He just doesn't line up with the family's way of doing things. He just doesn't know how to behave. Frankly, when he shows up, everyone groans within themselves and thinks "Oh boy, here we go again." We'll call this man Your Drunk Uncle. He's definitely seen better days. He's your Dad's brother so you have to let him in, but boy, you wish it could be otherwise. 

Okay, you get the picture. Now let's listen in on a gathering of Christians.

Hey, look! Here comes our Heavenly Father! Oh, It's so good when He's here. I wish He'd show up more often! It's so good when He's with us. Oh, look again! It's Jesus! Wow! It's even better when He shows up. Let's make sure He feels really welcome! This is the best gathering ever!

Uh oh, don't look now, but guess who just came in the door. It's the Holy Spirit. Just when things were settling in and going smooth, too. What is He going to do this time? Isn't He ever going to learn how to behave? Doesn't He know how He's supposed to act when we get together? After all, we have our way of doing things and He just doesn't fit in!

A Pleasant Life

Probably the most common human view is that it's God's role to make people's lives pleasant. Even many Christians see God that way. When things aren't pleasant, we wonder just how God has messed up this time. Doesn't He love us anymore? Did He ever really love us? Why are we serving God if He doesn't respond in kind? Why are we going to church more or less regularly and sometimes even tithing and usually forgiving others if we feel like it and maybe even sacrificing something because it's the Christian thing to do? Why go through all of that if God doesn't make my life pleasant?

A Round of Mercy and Rescue, on the House, for the House

I've been thinking a lot lately about the Big Time need the folks on this planet, this nation (oh, this nation!), my family!, ME!, are in fresh need, huge need, overwhelming need of God's mercy and rescue. He has to supply these things, in abundance, or they just aren't going to happen. We cannot fix ourselves. Society can't fix us. Government can't fix us. False religion can't fix us.

That's why I've adapted a line from old TV Westerns about the bartender who yells "Drinks are on the House!", meaning free drinks for everyone in the place. It's usually done to conclude a fight scene or celebrate something big.

Midnight Madness Sale

This is about a strong sense I've had the last few days that, frankly, I don't recall ever having before. Here's what I'm feeling. I'll try to use as few words as possible.

All over the world, the Lord is sweeping people into the Kingdom in huge numbers and at a very rapid rate. He is very much enjoying Himself.

That's pretty much it, except that I also keep getting the sense of a Midnight Madness Sale, the kind that a large store would have the night before Christmas Eve. The kind where people are lined up waiting to get in, then pushing their way in, finally rushing through the store and down the aisles, grabbing things right and left and filling their baskets as fast as they can. A deep sense of haste and excitement and hurry hurry hurry fills the whole place.

The Three Salvations

(I expand on these thoughts in the Post titled "Sanctification, the Middle Stage of Salvation". That Post will make more sense if you read this Post first.)

I'd like to say that Faith and Trust are two sides of the same coin, but there's really far more to it than that. When done right, both Faith and Trust lead to a full dependency upon God's provision and redemption. What He does for us is so overwhelming and immeasurable that I'm likely to understate it no matter how I try not to.

For now, though, I'm leaning towards saying that Faith and Trust are two facets of a many-faceted diamond. In my metaphor, the diamond represents a person's fully reconciled and restored relationship with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. That person is now free from God's wrath and ultimate judgement upon all that is unholy, unclean, and incompatible with His essence. A good Bible word that sums up that fully reconciled and restored relationship is "Salvation": Saved from myself, saved from His wrath, saved for His heart's delight.

Sanctification, the Middle Stage of Salvation

(This Post will make more sense if you read its companion Post, "The Three Salvations", first.)

I must say that one of the most important things I've learned over the years is that I'm not very good, not at all good, at fixing myself. At best, I can do a little around the edges, adjust around some weakness, put on a happy face, maybe make a new and improved habit or two, but I can't really fix the underlying parts of my essence that still need fixing. These are the deep parts of me that should pass away but don't. They keep hanging around, contaminating how I feel and think and act.

No matter how well we cover and disguise it, what's inside of us will come out some way some how, yes it will. No matter how difficult it is for these things to be fixed, I'm not excused from trying to fix them. I have to try -- woe is me if I don't try! -- but I also recognize that I'm really dependent upon the Holy Spirit to clean the inside of the cup. To be sure, there are days that I can make the outside of the cup look pretty good, but the inside? Let's be transparent and honest.

The One Thing I Must Have

We all have wish lists of things that we'd like. Take a moment now and think about what's on your wish list.

Maybe your wish list includes things like "I want my loved ones to be healthy, to be happy, to love the Lord and walk with Him all of their lives." The list may also include good health, more money, a better job, less debt, and freedom from some sin or pattern of failure. It could go down to things like a new roof for your house, a new car, new appliances and furniture. There are many other altruistic things that may be on your list, such as the desire to be fruitful in His service.

Like many folks, I've experienced great loss. I don't consider any of it exceptional, but it's been nonetheless very hard.

Humble, Contrite, & Broken vs. a Heart of Stone

God is not looking for ways to keep you or anyone else out of heaven. Quite the contrary: He's looking for ways to get you in.

The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance. (2 Peter 3:9)

The Ultimate Deal

Sometimes I over-simplify things; sometimes I over-complicate things. With that in mind, I'm going to very briefly share what I think God's ultimate deal is for us. I hope you can give me grace.

God is not a TV pitchman. This isn't a Two-fer. He's not like the fast-talking guy who names a price for something, then says "But Wait! There's More!", before finishing with "Just pay separate Shipping and Handling."

But He does have the most incredible deal ever for us. It's His best deal and you'll never see another one like it. 

A Vigorous, Firm Grip

God has always had a firm grip on things. I can't imagine that He's ever NOT been vigorous, but I've never sensed it like this. I don't know why He's making this truth come extra-alive in my heart at this time, but He is. Maybe this is for you to grab hold of. Maybe it's just so that I can pray with more confidence and force in these perilous times. Whatever God's reason, I feel strongly that I'm supposed to share this with you.

Looking back through history and looking around at the perilous times in which we live, it doesn't feel as though His grip is all that firm. But Scripture is clear in many places: He will have His way with His creation. As the Psalmist said to the Lord, "All things serve You." (Psalm 119:91).

The Psalmist's Cry is My Cry

These passages from Psalms speak to where my heart is this morning. May He grant us mercy!

Psalm 130    

Out of the depths I have cried to You, O LORD;
Lord, hear my voice! Let Your ears be attentive To the voice of my supplications.
If You, LORD, should mark iniquities, O Lord, who could stand?
But there is forgiveness with You, That You may be feared.
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, And in His word I do hope.
My soul waits for the Lord More than those who watch for the morning— Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.
O Israel, hope in the LORD; For with the LORD there is mercy, And with Him is abundant redemption.
And He shall redeem Israel From all his iniquities.

Psalm 119:173-176 

Let Your hand become my help, For I have chosen Your precepts.
I long for Your salvation, O LORD, And Your law is my delight.
Let my soul live, and it shall praise You; And let Your judgments help me.
I have gone astray like a lost sheep; Seek Your servant, For I do not forget Your commandments. 

Who Owns Who

The Bible tells us that all things were made through Jesus, by Jesus, and for Jesus (Colossians 1:16). All things. Everything. There's not anything or any being (including every angel and heavenly creature, demon or devil) anywhere that doesn't fit under the umbrella of that phenomenal statement. I don't understand why He has, to this point, allowed evil. But my lack of understanding doesn't change the fact of His purposeful ownership.

He is the Owner of it All. He doesn't share ownership. He's not part of a Board of Directors. He doesn't need anyone's approval or advice. He doesn't have to build a consensus, get agreement, or take a vote. There's not anyone He asks for advice, not anyone from whom He seeks approval. He is the owner; we are the owned. His ownership is without limits and our being owned is without limits.

He gets to do anything He wants anytime He wants and He never ever owes any of us an explanation.

A Prayer and Blessing

My prayer is that His wonderful plans be what you walk in, that the purposes and transforming power behind those plans fill your soul, and that your heart may grow in embracing and knowing His presence. I want your life to be soaked in His special love for you. I want His dreams for you to be so deeply and richly fulfilled that He will look at you and say, "It was all worth it. I can't wait to spend eternity with you."

I pray that your day will include these things: that today you will experience a God set-up, a God-given adventure and encounter, and His sweet gentle touch saying that He loves you. Plus, that all of this will prepare you for a huge outpouring of His presence in your life.

I really really really want the best for you. Seeing you fulfilled in Him and experiencing the life He is designing would bring me great joy. Him, too! And, of course, you. And it would be great for your loved ones. My heart yearns for that.

Keep growing in Him. Nothing will be wasted on that path. May your decision to wait for God's best grow deeper roots in your soul.

Remember that His intention in this phase of your life isn't to frustrate or test you. His whole heart is bent on blessing you by bringing you to a place where His dreams and plans for you are fulfilled. He loves you so much!

He loves the future He will have with you! Among all of the other things He is doing, God is preparing you for His best and is preparing His best for you. That you can be sure of.

Loving God, Loving People

There's an old joke that goes "I love the human race; it's people I can't stand." That's funny because there's so much truth in it. It's also a very sad reflection on the human heart.

Without question, people in the world are deceived and deceive themselves. But that often goes for Believers, too. Oh, yes, we can be very good at deceiving ourselves. For instance, Jesus makes it very clear that we are to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love our neighbors as ourselves. As Believers, though, it's easy to become busy with "Christian activities" and convince ourselves that we love Him more than we really do.

Prayer of Christian Renewal

Heavenly Father, I’m here to renew and reaffirm my relationship with you. I want to be the person You want me to be, but I struggle with things in my actions, heart, and thoughts that I know aren't pleasing to you. Like an arrow that misses its mark, I fall helplessly short. It feels like my very essence is corrupted and I can’t fix myself. I want to change but have learned that I can’t do it on my own. 

I believe that Jesus paid the full price for me – body, soul, and spirit – for the past, the present, and the future - through His death on the cross and His blood that He shed for me. I accept your sacrifice, Lord Jesus, and the price you paid for me. I can do nothing to add to what you've done.

Please forgive me of all of my sins, all the things that are ugly in my heart and thoughts. Set me free from unforgiveness, anger, and bitterness. Cleanse me inside and out. Change me! Rescue me!

Because you rose from the dead and now live as Lord of all, I give ownership of myself — all that I have been and all that I ever will be — to You. I declare that You are the Potter and I am your clay. Have your way with me, whatever You want, however You want. Turn me into clay that You can work with. Turn me into clay that pleases You.

Lord Jesus, establish your rule in my heart. Change me from the inside out so that my whole life – everything about me – reflects your Lordship, your love, your character, and your dreams for your creation. Only You can keep me from continuing to fall short. I want to know You far more than I know you now! I want to see your dreams fulfilled! Thank you, Lord! In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

When Your Faith Won't Fly

It's great when your faith is strong and things are moving right along. God and you are together knocking down the barriers that arise. You are using your understanding of Scripture along with clear direction from the Holy Spirit to pray and to stand and to push ahead. But what about those times when you simply can't muster the specific faith for a particular issue or situation? God has an answer for that.

Lucifer's Real Flaw

Most Bible scholars believe that Isaiah 14:12-14 and Ezekiel 28:12-18 tell us about Lucifer's transformation from an incredibly beautiful and powerful angel of light into Satan. Yes, that Satan, the enemy of God, the enemy of all God does, and the enemy of all God loves. Lucifer's once beautiful and pure essence became dark, evil, and unceasingly hateful, all by his own choice to rebel and seek his own glory. Every teaching I've heard on this subject attributes that horrid transformation to Lucifer's pride. I don't dispute that, but I've also come to think there was something missing deeper within him that allowed the fatal flaw of pride to flourish.

Little Picture, Big Pictue

What is God's purpose and God's "end game"? Scripture gives us a partial view of Heaven and Hell, Judgement and Rescue, and the nature of eternity with God. But it doesn't tell us everything about the future. Maybe this is a good time to remember that He is the Potter and we are just clay. He is the Owner; we are the Owned. He gets to do whatever He wants anytime He wants, and He never owes us an explanation. Many times He chooses to give us one, but many times He doesn't. It's His choice, always. But He had something wonderful in mind when He made us, because we were brought into existence for His pleasure and His purposes (Philippians 2:13).

The Unstoppable

Sometimes I get so tired, but then I remember that His agenda is rushing forward and carrying me with it whether I'm tired or not. There is an inevitable, irresistible movement to the purposes of God. In a sense, I'm just along for the ride. My occasional fatigue may bother me, but it doesn't slow God down one bit. His movement through time and space doesn't depend on me or, for that matter, on you. That, my friend, is good news for both of us.

God always has been and always will be unstoppable. I imagine Him sweeping everything with His broom; nothing is missed. He pushed His broom throughout the past, He is pushing it in the present, and He will continue pushing it forward through the end of what we call time. He sweeps with specific purpose. His sweeping cannot be delayed, side-stepped, misdirected, confused, blunted, slowed down, delayed, detoured, diluted, dammed up, held back, contaminated, avoided, tricked, fooled, or manipulated.

It's Gonna Be Okay

Here we are, the followers of Jesus, fully exposed before our Creator. I'd say warts and all, but that's not nearly strong enough. Describing what's still wrong with us as "warts" is like saying the Titanic had a leak. I used to think I was doing okay except for two or three issues I was working on plus maybe a blind-spot or two I hadn't seen yet. Now I'm not so sure of myself, not so sure that my blind-spots don't vastly outnumber my known-spots.

There is so much still in us that is profoundly unlike Him. I recognize now that much of what remains unchanged inside of me is deeply incompatible with eternity in heaven, deeply incompatible with the wonder and perfection of His essence. Yes, if you're a true born-again follower of Jesus, you're fully forgiven just as I am, but neither of us is through being changed. Don't fool yourself: if you're still in this life, you have only begun being changed.

His Best for You

I really want His best for you. I would love to hear your story someday, as much or as little as you wanted to share. Your story would be safe with me. But God already knows it all, even the parts you don't know yourself, the parts you've forgotten or misunderstood or buried or have no chance of fully understanding. He even knows the secret shameful parts that you've tried so hard to hide.  

Before God Made Man: The Prequel

In the way I imagine God's story, eternity -- whatever it is and however it works -- goes both forwards and backwards. Now, I'm convinced that eternity must have much more to it than forwards and backwards, but from our limited one-dimensional experience of time, forwards and backwards is all we know so it's all I can write about.

 

How I Imagine It

God's heart is full of love, love that bubbles over and craves release, love that chuckles and sings and dances to its own rhythm. That love isn't just something He carries around; it's who He is, woven inseparably into every fiber and thread of His being. 

 

An Itty-Bitty God

It can't be helped: a stunted view of God results in stunted faith and a weak Christian walk. Here are some thoughts on that subject.

On a recent Sunday morning, I heard a quote from Louie Giglio, the Pastor of Passion City Church in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. I'm going to take the liberty of repeating that quote here.

When God is not greatly praised, it's only because we don't think He's that great of a God. When our worship is small, it's because our concept of God is small. When we offer God little-bitty sacrifices, it's because we've somehow reduced Him in our hearts to a little-bitty God.

We lose sight of the reality of all realities: There's an infinite, limitless God high and exalted on His throne, ruling with all power and authority over the heavens and earth.

A God-focused Church

In this Post, the word "Church" refers to the Body of Christ (that is, people who are true followers of Jesus Christ), not the building. In this Post, I want to talk about how a local church's (and denomination's) leadership and habits -- that is, its way of doing things and understanding things, whether those ways are new or inherited -- can either cooperate with or hinder the work of God in people's lives. In this Post, you may recognize the church you attend. You may also get a better idea about the kind of Church you want to be a part of.

Traditions and Programs

Church Traditions and Programs can be good. They can even be really good. But they can also be stinkers that keep God from doing what He wants in your midst. Scripture makes it clear that there are two kinds of traditions: godly traditions that should be kept, and ungodly traditions that should be abandoned.

Whether any tradition or program is good, bad, or indifferent, He is never encompassed by it. One may line up nicely with what He's doing. Another may box you in and keep you from His best. But whether a way of doing things is good, bad, or simply mediocre, He is never boxed-in by it. Never!

So here's the warning: Beware of a man's ideas masquerading as what God says or wants to do. Just because a church tradition or program is treated as if it always has been and always will be God's idea doesn't make it so.

God may choose for a season or even longer to do His work alongside a church’s program, but that doesn't automatically mean He's endorsing the program; He might be, and He might not be. What if He's moving in spite of the program?

This is His Story, We are His Song

There is a wonderful Fanny Crosby hymn written more than a hundred years ago titled "Blessed Assurance". The chorus says, "This is my story, this is my song, Praising my Saviour all the day long." Maybe you've heard it.

I didn't think of that hymn until after the title for this Post had already hit me. But hey, it works. Just for the fun of it, I'll paste the lyrics to the hymn at the bottom of this Post. If you know the tune, sing it! The full song is all over the Internet, so Google it if you'd like to hear it.

Okay, now down to business.

Scripture tells us that Jesus is The Author and Finisher of our faith (Heb 12:2) and that
All things were made by Him and through Him and for Him. (Col. 1:16)

It was His idea to start all of this. I'm talking about the big "All": all of life, all of the universe, all of the past, all of the future. Back before the beginning of time, it was His idea and His story. He has never ceased to own the story and He never will.

God in a Box, Dog in a Pickup

When I was a young man in the Lord, my devotion was strong but my limited understanding of His ways limited my walk with Him. It was as though my life was a nice sedan; I was driving and had God close, Him sitting and watching from the backseat. Pretty neat, I thought. Most people are driving around by themselves, but I have God in my car! I can ask Him for help anytime I need it. "Lord, there's a turn coming up; should I go left or right?"  "Lord, we're hitting a bumpy patch in the road; can you help out here?" I thought that was pretty good, and it was, far better than most folks have it.

But then, in a few short years, I fell into some very difficult circumstances. They were really my fault, but I chose to blame the Lord. Why did He let this happen? In my heart, my nice sedan morphed into a long bus and I moved Him all the way into the last row. It was as though I was saying, "Lord, you messed that up. Since it's obvious I can't really count on You, I'm taking over from here on out. You stay way back there and I'll let you know when I need you."

Pure Heart, Simple Truth

(This was originally published on April 2, 2013. This is a revision of that original Post.) 

Folks who's hearts are hardened against God can’t make much sense of His truth. Because they don’t want to surrender to Him, they struggle with His truth. They'll say that the Bible doesn’t make sense, so they can’t believe in Him. But that’s backwards. Refusal to surrender comes first; that’s the reason their hearts won’t let them believe. Deep in their hearts, hidden even from themselves, they choose lies over surrender.

In effect they're saying to God, "Reveal Yourself to me and then I'll think about giving my life to You."  I believe Jesus Christ requires a very different approach. He says to a person, "Have a heart that's ready to yield and then I'll reveal Myself."
 
He is always ready to reveal Himself to someone who is yielded and tender towards Him. That's not a direct quote from Scripture, but the thought is definitely Scriptural.
 
If you don’t get anything else from this message, get this: Our Saviour, Jesus Christ, has many things to share with a tender, pure heart that He cannot share with a hardened heart.

The Sin that Condemns

This statement may upset a few folks who prefer a more rigid theological discussion, but I can't think of a better way to say it.

When you boil it down, there is only one sin that, at the final judgement, inevitably results in eternal condemnation. That's not a theological statement, but rather a practical statement of how it's going to work out.

I'm not saying that it's okay to commit sin as long as you don't commit this one sin. Sin is anything that falls short of God's perfection and essence, whether it's an attitude or heart pattern, something you did, or something you didn't do that God thinks you should have.

All sin is ugly and horribly wrong. Any sin and every sin makes you incompatible with God because it means that your essence is incompatible with His essence. Any sin and every sin will be judged. But all sin can be forgiven, except for this one.

Too Far Gone?

Are you beyond forgiveness? Are you too far gone for God to fix or to even want to fix?

Many feel like God's forgiveness is for other folks, but not them. What they have done is too bad, too wrong, to be forgiven by God. Others feel like they need no forgiveness from God. They have little awareness of the "wrongness" in their lives. Those folks need to wake up, but that's another topic for another day.

The Bible has a word for anything that falls short of God's character and nature. That word is sin. The list of things we've done that fall short is a list of our sins. But beneath that list is a corrupt, unholy essence. So here's the question for today: are your sinful acts and the corrupt essence that is their foundation too much for God?

No Matter What, I Win

"All things work together for good..." Romans 8:28 is a frequently quoted, frequently preached passage of Scripture. Unfortunately, it's often made to sound as though when something bad happens to one of His children, God nudges one of the angels and says "You know, Bob (for example) had a bad day. Let's turn his lemons into lemonade."

That's a nice thought, and occasionally it seems to work that way, but that really isn't at all what Romans 8:28 is about. In context, this passage tells us the mystery of what He is up to long term. In fact, He's so determined that the mystery of what He's up to will happen that He uses three very powerful words to describe His determination. In the next couple of verses, He says that you are Called to this mystery, you are Predestined for this mystery, and you are Foreknown for this mystery. In my mind, the words He chooses make this much more than a promise. He is flat out stating a fact: I WILL do this.

Take a deep breath, because this mystery is stunning in its simplicity and almost beyond belief in its extravagance. It is totally over-the-top and unimaginably incredible. Now, what is the mystery that He's going to do?

More Than Forgiveness!

Have you ever noticed that when you pick up a coin, you pick up both sides? You can't pick up just the head's side, you can't pick up just get the tail's side. It's the same with being a true disciple of Jesus Christ.

The head's side of the disciple's coin is God's forgiveness. His forgiveness is ours for the asking, based on what Jesus accomplished on the Cross. But if God's plan stopped there -- and it doesn't!...but if it did -- leaving me unchanged, I would go through eternity being forgiven but miserable because I'd still be the same old me in the midst of a beautifully holy heaven.

That's why the tail's side of the disciple's coin is there. The tail's side is God's transformation, kick-started by repentance. The tail's side finishes the process started by the head's side. The tail's side is an inseparable part of the bargain. If you've really taken the coin, total transformation has already started, even though there's still a very long way to go.

Dreams of Love

Sometimes, even the strongest of us need to be reminded that we are not alone. So remember this: Whatever else is going on in this physical, human realm, God is always closer to you than you are to yourself. That's a line from A.W. Tozer, and it's always stuck with me. It's an amazing statement and it's absolutely true.

Think about it. He is always closer to you than you are to yourself.

Now recognize that He also arranges for some of His children to think about you, pray for you, miss you, love you, and crave His very best for you. You are not alone, though you may feel lonely.

A Simple Prayer on a Sunday Afternoon

Father, You know my needs and You know the list of things I'm concerned about. I give them all to You. Take my list and rewrite it as you see fit. You may change all of it if You want. In the list you write for me, please oh please! make it include a full-blown love relationship with You! Let me care so much about Your happiness that Your dreams and passions overwhelm me, becoming my dreams and passions. Let me lose myself in them. Whatever that may mean and however it may turn out, do it and don't leave me like You find me now.Complete the good work you have begun in me, write your laws and ways on my heart and mind, and perfect that which concerns me. Let every one of your heart's desires for goodness and the work of faith with power occupy all of who I am. Amen.

I find these words easier to say than to mean. They're even harder to wrap my mind around. I pray them anyway, asking Him to let the concept behind the prayer make itself at home in me, becoming the rule in the center of who I am.

Make this your prayer. I already pray it for you. It may seem scary at first, but the reality is that a prayer like this is probably the safest prayer you can make.

The Heart of a Scholar

Be an honest scholar. Have a heart that is tender towards Him and weigh everything by Scripture. What does it really say? You can't pick and choose, “I like this verse but I don’t like that one”, or “God meant this verse but He didn’t mean that verse”.

Study it for yourself. It's not good enough to take someone else's word for it. It’s not good enough to take a famous preacher’s word for it. It’s not good enough to take a respected Bible teacher’s word for it. You must become a student of the Bible. You must come to know Scripture for yourself and let God make the truth come alive in your heart. 

This assumes, of course, that God wants to communicate and interact with you directly. And that, my friend, is the right assumption. 

Shaking Has A Purpose

I sense that the Holy Spirit is saying something, right here and right now, to His people. I'm not getting word-for-word dialogue from God that I can share word-for-word. However, I am having a consistent theme in my spirit. I'll try to put what I'm sensing into words that share that essence. At times like this, I'll continue to search the Holy Spirit and seek out better words, sometimes finding them. As that happens, I'll edit this post.

This message is parallel to what I've sensed off and on over the years, but now it is much more urgent.

Radical, Part 1

Warning: I use the word "radical" a lot in this post. I meant to. 

At the time I'm writing this blog post, I've been asked to lead a few men through a short-term Bible study titled "Radical". By the time you see this blog post, I'm probably already through it. At this moment, though, I don't know anything about it other than the title. I'll begin looking at the course materials in the next few days.

The course title, though, has already stirred my heart. Radical. What a title! It's a topic I've given considerable thought to over the years, mostly because I've glimpsed how I fell short in that regard. Radical. That's the kind of Christian life I want to lead, yet looking back, it's clear that I've talked about it much more than I've actually done it.

Philippians 2

I've been reading Philippians the last couple of days. There's a passage in Chapter 2 that I feel like I'm supposed to post "as is", without comment. May the Lord make this come alive in your heart, freshly breathed from Him just for you.

Philippians 2:3-11, New King James Version

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.

Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men.

And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

May this be exactly what you needed to hear today.  

My Reason for Being

I want to keep this Post as brief and to the point as possible. I think the Lord keeps speaking to my heart about these things because He wants me to keep focus. This is a high-level review of the simple principles of life.

How do I justify the space I take and the air I breathe in this world? By one thing and one thing only: by walking and growing and fulfilling my small part in His infinitely larger dreams. At the personal level, His dreams are customized for me and for you. Apart from Jesus, I cannot come close to getting my part right, not in a way that He would call right. It's also true that I can't play your part in His dreams and you can't play mine. 

Let's be clear that everything I say about me applies to you, too.

So, what do His dreams include? Since it would be quite arrogant and foolish of me to think I understand more than a smidgen of His plans and dreams, let me say up front that I can only share the glimpse that I have.

Doing My Part

Sometimes I think of my Christian walk as a sort of partnership with God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. It's a hugely weighted-towards-God, one-sided partnership, for sure, but there are bits in there that depend upon me. I've been trying to think of a way to describe this one-sided "symbiosis" between God and those He is rescuing from destruction. I'm sure that "symbiosis" isn't quite the right word, but it's the best one that comes to mind right now.

The more people He gets to rescue, the more children He gets to love and share Himself with, and that's what He wants. He really wants to spend eternity with people who are totally unlike Him and then are so completely transformed that they conform to the image of His Son. 

He's not looking for ways to keep us out of eternity with Him. Quite the contrary, He's looking for ways to bring us into eternity with Him.

His existence doesn't depend on us the way ours depends on Him. In that sense, He doesn't need us, but He very much wants us. He can live quite well without us, but He doesn't want to. His desire to love us is so extraordinarily strong that He has gone to a great deal of trouble and anguish to bring us aboard His "Love Boat".

Our Reason for Being

We know that God is the Creator. When we say that, we are usually talking about "creating" as thought it's just something He does. But it is much more than that. Creating isn't just something He does; it's something He is. To put it in human terms (forgive me, Lord! Human terms are the best I can do!), He is wired to create. It's like He can't stop. He loves to create because He loves to be known, to share life and enjoy life with what He creates. When He shares life, He is sharing Himself because life isn't just something he gives, life is something He is (John 5:26).

Before making this creation in which we live, I think that He probably indulged in many creations. After all, eternity for Him extends backwards as well as forwards. For Him, time extends in all kinds of ways that we literally cannot imagine. He made angels long before He made us. He made the four living creatures around the throne (Revelation 4:6) long before He made us. Long before us, He made the wondrous beings that Ezekiel described. No one knows what else He made long before us.

Don't Feel Bad for Job

The Book of Job is easy to misunderstand and misuse. You just can't grab any verse out of the book and say that it's a clear statement of truth as God sees it. Many of the characters' statements are truth as they see it, but they happen to be seeing and saying it wrong. At first blush, many of their statements may look and sound like truth but are actually skewed versions of truth. At the end of the story, it's clear that God wasn't at all happy with those skewed versions of truth. After all, skewed truth is untruth and is even more dangerous because of its subtle resemblance to the real deal. 

So, here's my non-theological, high-level view of what REALLY happened in the Book of Job. The Holy Spirit took me through this book during a very tough time in my life, through things not of my choosing nor of my doing. I was deeply changed through that season, changed for the better.

Quick Hitters

A short collection of things I think about.

1. He alone is the Creator. Everything else and every other being, no matter how angelic, other-worldly, supernatural, long-lived or powerful, is something He made and owns with absolute ownership. He answers only to Himself.
   
2. He is not limited to the dimension or realm in which we live. From our viewpoint, His reality is uncountable dimensions. From His viewpoint, His reality is a single dimension that encompasses EVERYTHING.
3. His nature, character, and essence go so far beyond what we can comprehend or even imagine, that – though He Is One – He is One in such a way that we can’t really grasp it. So, He shows us His Oneness in three very real personages: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. That’s a deeply inadequate way of saying it, but it’s the best I can understand, and even that just barely. Even though I don't really understand it, I fully believe it.
4. As Creator, He has absolute, unlimited right of ownership over everything and everyone. Absolute and unlimited.
5. Nothing stops Him but Himself. He is always true to Himself and fully consistent with His fully consistent nature. You can't limit Him, I can't limit Him, nothing can limit Him. 
6. He has no internal contradictions. He will never do, think, want, or feel anything contrary to His perfect nature.
7. He gets to do anything He wants, anytime He wants, and He never owes me – or you – an explanation. That can be a scary thought, but when I'm surrendered and trusting in His Son and in His wonderful plans, it's not scary at all. In fact, it's a good thing.

Less is More

In the previous post ("The Ultimate Ambition", July 28, 2013), I wrote about what it means to be truly in love with God. Here are a few more thoughts along those lines.

The more we become emotionally invested in the things that are on God's heart and less emotionally invested in the things are our on our hearts -- well, the better everything becomes and the more our lives have real meaning in His eyes, as He defines real meaning.

I have to put this in human terms, always a less than satisfactory way of describing God and His ways, but it's all I can think to write for now: Is my happiness tied up in His happiness? Or, so long as I'm happy, do I really care whether He is happy? In that last sentence, substitute the words contented, satisfied, and fulfilled for the word "happy". Go ahead, take a moment and try it.

Ask yourself:

• So long as I'm contented, do I really care whether He is contented?
• So long as I'm satisfied, do I really care whether He is satisfied?
• So long as I'm happy, do I really care whether He is happy?

The Ultimate Ambition

It's now 4:00 AM on a Sunday morning. I've already been up for a couple of hours. It wasn't what I wanted, but the dog had other ideas. I couldn't go back to sleep, so I started reading and praying through a few Psalms. The Lord was kind and met with me this morning, stirring my heart to share a few thoughts.

The closer He draws us to Himself, the simpler everything gets. The highest ambition a person can have is this: to be carried away in His dreams, to desire the fulfillment of His dreams more than anything. I want us all to lose ourselves in His dreams!

Is God Angry with You?

Do you feel like God is angry with you? Believers often struggle with repetitive, unresolved sin issues in their personal lives, failings that they can't seem to get beyond. It's easy to see God as angry...angry with me, angry with you...because of our sin failures. We often see our Heavenly Father through the same filter that we viewed our earthly dads. In most cases, that's a bad thing and gives us a very poor understanding of our Heavenly Father. I certainly hope that my sons don't use me as the lens through which they view God the Father.

Here is the main thought of this Post: If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, a true believer, you are not subject to God's wrath. You are subject to His correction, but not His wrath. There is a huge difference. His goal is to fix you, not to punish you. His goal is to conform you to the image of His Son (Romans 8:29) so that He may love on you and enjoy your company forever. His correction will be complete, not half-hearted and not half-way. He knows what it will take to get to every last drop of badness. His ways may seem rather strong and stern at times, but His correction will not be done out of wrath.

All My Desire

It's Sunday morning. I'm ready for church a bit early and some verses I read an hour ago are still speaking to me. The first one is Psalm 38:9: "Lord, all my desire is before You; And my sighing is not hidden from You." 

He knows what I need and what I'd like to have and have happen, all of it. I've put it all in front of Him. But that's not what I want to be wrapped up in. Me getting wrapped up in my stuff and you getting wrapped up in your stuff is normal, common, every-day existence. But that doesn't make it right or good or desirable. It definitely doesn't make it the best way to live. In fact, it's a poor way to live, a way that doesn't end well.

I don't want to be normal, whatever that is.

More Than Forgiveness

My mind and heart keep coming back to foundation thoughts. By now, you know that I've been a Believer for over 40 years, but I won't pretend that I've been a particularly devoted Christ-follower for all of that time. For some of it, I've been a lackadaisical Christ-follower. Even worse, there have been times when Christ-following was completely on the back burner, as much out-of-sight, out-of-mind as I could make it. I'm not going to get into my details. You have your own details, and I hope this post will help you get through some of them.

Maybe it's that I'm getting old enough to sometimes remember things from long ago more clearly than I remember things from last week. Failures and foolishness from long ago have been coming up in my quiet moments. Whatever the reason, I see that I need more than forgiveness.